who_is_she | picaclick

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It had been two weeks since the cave-in, and things were just now starting to settle. Tony had spent the first handful of days in the hospital, until the worst of his injuries had started to heal and he could be moved. His time in the hospital had been a blur of pain medication and sleep, and a few lucid periods in between that mostly involved tears. He'd taken up residence in Roddie's quarters (though, that implied he hadn't already basically been living there) with some medical equipment that Ajax monitored. Roddie had finally stopped looking like he was going to burst into tears every time he looked at Tony by the end of the first week, and had instead launched his routine to get Tony back on his feet; intense and constant affection and attention to Tony's every need. It was a little stifling, honestly, but Tony found he had the patience to deal with it because he knew what Roddie had been though, what he'd put himself through, and he knew this was his way of healing--slowly.

Tony had patience, but only to a point. It had been several days since Tony's minor aches and bruises had faded, and aside from the broken arm, leg and ankle he was starting to feel all right. At least, he felt less like moving at all was torture, and found he could sit up in bed and move around a little, as far as he could manage without disturbing his broken limbs. Mostly this just meant that he could return some of the affection Roddie had been heaping on him, and this was where his patience was starting to wear thin. Roddie would lay with him and kiss him gently for hours, sometimes just cuddling while Tony amused himself with reading or tending to the ship's systems from a tablet, but for the last couple of days Tony had felt well enough to reciprocate. He could lay on his good side, arrange his legs carefully, and kiss Roddie back with little discomfort.

Whenever they moved past anything soft and gentle, however, Roddie would jump out of the bed and make excuses to leave. They hadn't had sex since before the accident, which for the most part hadn't been a problem because Tony's sex drive disappeared when the prospect of rapid arm movements was a very painful idea, but now it was different. He knew Roddie must be aching for it like he was, and even if they couldn't do some of the more... energetic acts they usually favored, Tony just wanted the physical intimacy and closeness again. He missed Roddie.

Tony was laying in bed and stewing over this, pretending to read but really thinking about how much he missed the taste of Roddie in his mouth.

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When he wasn't at Tony's side, which was not very often, Roddie had been venting a lot of his stress and, shamefully, his sexual frustration, through exercise. He, Zakeef, and Boscha had built up a small gym in the cargo hold over the years, and he'd been using the equipment now more than ever. He'd just finished running about 3 miles on their treadmill and had showered, and was still towelling off as he heads up to his room to check on Tony.

"Oh, hey!" he says, grinning when the door opens and he sees Tony sitting up in bed, "You're awake. How do you feel?"

He leans over to peck tony on the lips before stripping down to his boxers and heading over to look through his closet for a change of clothes. m

Tony forgets to answer Roddie's question, his mouth going dry as he watches Roddie undress instead. His eyes follow the bunching muscle of Roddie's back as he moves, feeling a sudden and intense desire to touch him, with his hands or tongue or whatever was closest. It's not until the tablet he was reading on slips out of his slack fingers and falls down onto the bed that he realizes he didn't answer Roddie's question.

"Oh, uh, I'm fine," he says, his voice a little strangled as he tries to get himself together. He's seen Roddie undress hundreds of times by now, and there was no reason the sight of it should be enough to get his heart pounding. But, damn, Roddie was just so hot.

"Fine," he repeats, his voice more steady after he clears his throat, "I've been feeling a lot better, actually."

Roddie shoots him a smile over his shoulder as he grabs a tank top undershirt and a pair of sweatpants out of his closet. He steps into the pants first, then pulls the shirt up over his head.

"That's good," he says cheerfully, walking over to the side of the bed he normally slept on and climbing in beside him, pecking his cheek as he settles in comfortably beside him. He rests his head on Tony's shoulder and looks over at the tablet in his hands.

"Whatcha reading?" he asks, "More fanfiction?"

"Shut up," Tony says, laughing and smacking Roddie gently with the tablet, "It's just some theories on artificial intelligence. I've been thinking about trying to pinpoint what it is exactly that creates it, based on Ajax and Irra. Or boring nerd stuff, as some would put it," he says, doing a passable impression of Roddie's accent. He sets the tablet down and moves his arm to circle Roddie's shoulders, bringing him in closer.

"But now you're here to save me from this boring stuff, right?" he says, smirking as he leans in to kiss Roddie, licking into his mouth, determined not to let Roddie get away without getting off this time.

Roddie lets out a slightly high pitched laugh in his surprise, and he knows he should cut it short, tell him he needs to rest, but he finds he can't help returning the kiss, meeting Tony's tongue with his own and putting his arm around Tony's middle.

"Uh, I," he says quietly, swallowing a little, "I mean, maybe. I mean...I-I just -- remembered there's some...statistics I have to...uh, analyze, I'm...expecting a call from a -- job...giver."

He starts to pull away, mouth dry and his body desperate and aching, and he curses himself for not doing a more exhausting work out.

Tony's arm holds more tightly onto Roddie when he starts to pull back, and gives his excuse an incredulous look.

"Analyzing statistics," Tony repeats, and then decides to pull out the big guns and reaches down, picking up his leg by the cast and throwing it over Roddie's legs, knowing he wouldn't jerk away and risk hurting Tony's leg.

"There," he says, leaning in close to kiss Roddie's again, "Now, can you lay here with me, or at least come up with a more believable excuse if you really want to get out of spending time with me?"

"I don't want to get out of spending time with you!" Roddie protests, his body stiffening to avoid any movement that might hurt Tony's leg, "I-I just don't want you to get hurt, that's all. You're not supposed to be exerting yourself, and I...I don't want to be the reason you get hurt worse."

He bites his lip and reluctantly lets his hands fall back around Tony's waist.

"I miss you, really, I miss you like hell, but I-I don't know if it's...safe."

Tony sighs a little, moving his leg back and then reaching up to run his fingers through Roddie's hair.

"It's all right, Roddie, I know my own limits," he says softly, letting his hand fall back to cup the back of his neck, "I'm not going to break. And even if I can't... you know, be an active participant, I could... do something for you." He leans in, kissing Roddie soundly, "You've been working so hard, taking care of me... Let me return the favor," he says, dropping his voice to an intimate whisper.

"I...I don't deserve that," Roddie blurts out, surprising himself. Despite Tony's insistence that Roddie not take the blame for what had happened onto himself, he found he couldn't fight the guilt that had still been eating away at him, though he hadn't meant to tell Tony as much.

"I-I mean, I...I'm the one who got you into this," he continues, his mouth running almost out of control now, "You can't...risk your recovery just to...I don't know, do...whatever, just --"

His expression is one of deep shame, now, and he puts his face in his hands in his embarrassment, but he still can't summon the will to get up and leave

"Oh, Roddie," Tony said, his heart aching for the shame and regret in Roddie's expression. He'd expected that their conversation in the hospital wouldn't be the end of Roddie's guilt, but he kind of hoped that Roddie would realize it wasn't his fault. He pulls Roddie in close, hugging him tightly.

"I know you don't believe it, but it wasn't your fault. You didn't cause the cave-in, right? I would never even consider blaming you for this, because no matter what you may have said I was always going to go with you. I always am going to go with you, wherever that is, because I love you and my place is at your side. I never want to be anywhere else." He kisses the side of Roddie's head, then leans back to pepper kisses across his temple and eyes and cheeks, "You have nothing at all to feel guilty about, and you deserve all the rest and good things I can give you, because you saved me. You're my hero." That comes out a little more raw than Tony had intended, but it had never been so true.

Roddie laughs a little grimly and keeps his eyes downturned as Tony kisses his face, but he does allow himself to relax a little further than before, and returns the hug, albeit somewhat weakly.

"Well If you're gonna follow me everywhere, maybe I shouldn't be running into collapsing mines anymore," he says hoarsely, his fingers twisting into the fabric of Tony's shirt, "You'd think I might have learned that when I lost half my body, though."

He shuts his eyes and unclenches the muscles in his neck, letting his head rest on the pillow. He almost feels tearful again, but he manages to hold it back this time.

"I love you," he says, his expression pained, "I'm sorry."

"Apology not accepted," Tony says primly, "Because you've got nothing to apologize for." He runs his hand over Roddie's neck and back, sighing again, "I know it's hard, but it's really, definitely in no way your fault. But I'll be here to remind you to go easier on yourself if you forget, okay? You did absolutely everything you could, and you deserve a very nice blow job. Multiple blow jobs. Hundreds, even," Tony says, leaning back a little so Roddie can see his soft, affectionate smile.

"What do you say?"

Roddie laughs a little, weakly, at Tony's words, and he lets his eyes open up again halfway.

"You want to suck my dick that bad, huh?" he jokes halfheartedly, stroking his hand over the one Tony had on his face.

"I...God, all right, but...be careful, and...you gotta let me do something for you, too. I mean, if you can handle it. And lie still for it. Okay?"

He sighs, a little shakily, and kisses the palm of Tony's hand.

"I'll...think about the other stuff you said too," he says.

"Good," Tony says, "To all of that. And yes, I want your cock in my mouth that bad. I miss it. It's been two whole weeks. We haven't gone that long without having sex before."

Tony leans forward to adjust his pillows a little, so that he can sit up a little straighter. He leans back into the pillows and then gestures for Roddie to come closer.

"Here, you can sit on my chest and I won't have to move at all."

"All right, all right," Roddie says, nodding. He tugs his shirt off and slides out of his pants, exposing his cock, which had already hardened somewhat at Tony's words, and he strokes himself a few times with his hand to help himself further along. He swings his leg over Tony's chest carefully, making sure not to put too much pressure on him, especially not anyplace where it might hurt, and braces himself with his hands tightly grasping the headboard of the bed.

Tony nods, biting his lip and watching hungrily as Roddie strips, feeling his own erection swelling under the covers and wishing he had a spare hand.

"God, you're so hot," Tony breathes as Roddie gets in position, licking his lips as Roddie's cock bobs in front of his face, "I want you so much." That's the only time he spares before he gets his mouth on Roddie, wrapping his one hand around the base of his cock and guiding it forward. He can't move his head very much in this position, so he just gets right to it and wraps his mouth around the head of Roddie's erection, sucking and rubbing his tongue against the underside.

Roddie moans softly, leaning his head against the headboard of the bed and looking down at Tony's face. He makes small, hesitant rolling motions with his own hips, watching his cock moving in and out of Tony's mouth with a slightly slackjawed expression.

"Th-This is okay, right?" he stammers, "Nothing hurts?"

It doesn't occur to him until after he's asked that Tony couldn't answer him very well in his current position.

Tony makes a pleased humming noise in response, looking up and meeting Roddie's gaze with an eyebrow raised. Then he closes his eyes and concentrates on his task, moaning at the taste and feel of Roddie in his mouth. He moves his hand to Roddie's hip, giving him more room to swallow down his length.

Tony likes the slide of Roddie's cock against his tongue, and pulls back a little on Roddie's hip, encouraging him to fuck into his mouth with another pleased sound.

"A-ah -- y-yeah, okay, okay, I'm doing it," Roddie moans, making his movements a little bigger while still being careful not to hurt or choke him. He takes one of his hands off the headboard, bringing it down instead to push his fingers back through Tony's hair.

"O-oh -- God, Tony," he whines, biting down hard on his lip as he fights the way his body was telling him to fuck his mouth harder than he knows he should, "Tony, Tony, fuck."

Tony moans, his hips jerking up a little against nothing, and after a small twinge of pain he has to remind himself not to push up with his legs. He sucks and licks more desperately at Roddie's cock as it thrusts into his mouth, spurred on by Roddie's words and the tone of his voice.

He tugs harder on Roddie's hip, encouraging him to let go and just fuck his mouth like he wants to. Tony knows he can take it--has taken it before--and even if he does end up with a slightly sore throat, it would absolutely be worth it, and a far better soreness than the kind he'd been experiencing for the last two weeks.

"Okay, okay, all right," Roddie huffs, "Y-You gotta like...pinch me or something if it's not good, though, okay?" His fingers twist in Tony's hair, not pulling, but still holding his head steady, and he lets himself fuck into the warmth of his mouth, moaning loudly as he feels the tip of it pushing into the back of Tony's throat.

"Oh, fucking hell," he gasps after a minute or two, gritting his teeth, "T-Tony, oh my god, your mouth is so -- ah, you're too good at this, Jesus Christ, I'm...I'm getting there."

His breathing was becoming labored, and he holds onto the base of his cock as he makes a few long, slow strokes deep into Tony's throat.

"I-I'm gonna come," he warns him, his breathing ragged and his voice broken.

Tony moans desperately, his fingers digging into Roddie's hip as he breathes hard through his nose. He sucks as hard as he can, pressing his tongue up against Roddie's cock on the slide in, wanting Roddie to come down his throat, wanting to feel it. He opens his eyes to look up at Roddie and watch his orgasm, and Roddie's eyes are dark and intent on his own.

Tony feels helplessly aroused, desperately wants to touch himself but he can't reach around Roddie's hip. And having to wait just amplifies every little sensation, and Tony can't help but writhe on the bed, doing his best to keep the pressure off his legs.

Roddie gets in a few more strokes before he's coming hard down Tony's throat, grunting and gasping loudly as he braces himself against the headboard. He pulls out of his mouth slowly when he's finished, his head swimming as he looks down at him, and carefully climbs off of his chest and onto the bed beside him.

"Holy shit," he gasps, running his hand back through his hair "Th-that was so good, that was so good, Tony, are you okay?" Not waiting for an answer, he flops on the bed beside Tony and kisses Tony's cheek and temple as he catches his breath, and wastes no time in reaching down to fondle and squeeze at the bulge in the front of Tony's pants.

"You're so fucking hard, Tony," he pants, the rawness of what they'd just done, combined with the relaxed state the orgasm had put him in and the desperation he'd been suppressing for weeks, tearing down the barriers that usually kept him from saying anything overly vulgar when they were together. He unfastens Tony's pants easily and frees his erection from his underwear, and sets to work stroking it eagerly.

"You relax, okay?" he says huskily, "Take it easy, baby, I'm gonna take care of you."

Tony doesn't even have time to assure Roddie that he's all right, or beg to be touched, because Roddie beats him to it. He whines when Roddie gets a hand on him, his head dropping back as he gasps and moans.

"That was so hot, Roddie, God," he gasps, then reaches up to grab Roddie's shoulder, "I missed you so much." He pulls on Roddie until he can kiss him, heedless of where his mouth has been or what he tastes like, just needing the intimacy.

"I love you," he gasps into Roddie's mouth, "I love you so much."

"I love you too," Roddie pants, "I love you too, baby, come here."

He kisses him deeply and passionately, without a second thought to where Tony's mouth had been moments before, and he strokes him with enthusiasm, pausing only momentarily to spit into his hand.

"What do you want?" he asks, searching Tony's face, "What do you want me to do? You want me to blow you or stay here?"

"No, no, stay here," Tony says, moaning, "I'm close. Kiss me." He kisses Roddie sloppily, his movements losing concentration as he nears climax.

He breaks the kiss as he feels his orgasm approaching, and tilts his forehead against Roddie's as he moans desperately and swears.

"Ah, fuck, Roddie, so good," he gasps after a string of swears, "I'm coming!" He throws his head back and moans loudly, coming all over Roddie's fist.

Roddie strokes him through it, kissing at the corners of Tony's open mouth as he comes. When Tony's finished, he holds him close for a minute, breathing in time with him and not paying much mind to the mess while Tony catches his breath, but it then occurs to him that if Tony got anything on any of the casts, it might be difficult to explain.

"Here, hang on," he says, standing up and retrieving a clean towel to clean him off. He cleans his hand with it first, then quickly wipes up the mess on Tony's stomach, before discarding the towel (in the hamper, this time) and settling back into bed next to him.

"How do you feel?" he asks, stroking his cheek and looking into his eyes with an earnest expression, "Not hurt, right?"

Tony gives Roddie a big, blissful grin, turning his head to kiss at Roddie's fingers.

"I feel... fantastic," he says emphatically, rolling his shoulders and stretching his good arm, "I really needed that. Like, a lot." Tony smiles at Roddie, bubbling over with love and affection, and leans in to kiss him.

"You're perfect," he sighs into Roddie's mouth, "Perfect, and amazing, and beautiful, and the best person in the whole universe."

Roddie can't help but laugh a little, overwhelmed by Tony's display of affection.

"I better tell Ajax to ease up on those painkillers," he giggles against his mouth, "I think theyre messing with your head."

He kisses Tony's lips, then his nose, then back to his mouth again, and he pulls the blankets over them and snuggles in close.

"I...needed that too," he mumbles, pressing his nose and forehead up against Tony's and affectionately stroking his cheek.

"I think you're messing with my head," Tony counters, laughing, adjusting his pillows so he can lay down with Roddie, calling out the voice command to shut off the lights.

He settles down next to Roddie, putting his arm around him and idly pushing his fingers through his hair.

"Do you feel better?" Tony asks a moment later, his tone more serious now.

"I...guess I do, yeah," Roddie mutters, smiling softly as he lets his head rest on Tony's arm. He closes his eyes, relaxing into the feeling of Tony's fingers on his scalp.

"I...having you like this, I feel less like...like everything's...different than it was before," he says, his eyes looking down to follow the movement of his hand over Tony's chest and stomach.

"Like...you're really here, and if we can...be together like this then you're going to be okay...I guess," he goes on, trying to keep his tone from getting too heavy.

"Yeah," Tony says, smiling softly over at Roddie, "That's good. And pretty soon we'll even be able to really have sex again," Tony says, laughing, only playing up the excitement in his voice a little. He felt immensely reassured and relaxed now, not to mention happy.

"If you... start to feel bad again, you can talk to me about it. Or one of the others, I'm sure they'd be happy to as well. You don't have to do it alone," Tony says gently, kissing the side of his head and then his cheek.

Roddie nods, turning his head to the side to meet Tony's lips with his own. He just pecks him at first, but after abeat or two he brings a hand up to his neck, kissing him soft and slow and humming softly as he presses his tongue against Tony's. He kisses him for a long while before slowly bringing it to a close and breaking apart, leaving his eyes closed as a contented smile spreads across his face.

"You wanna keep doing your boring stuff?" he asks, stroking Tony's cheek with his thumb, "I'll stay with you."

Tony just hums, leaning into Roddie's touch and letting his eyes stay closed.

"No, this is good. We can just... lay here, for a while," Tony says, his voice sounding far away, "You're so warm." He lets his head rest against Roddie's, feeling utterly relaxed and better than he has since before the accident. He's not quite tired enough to fall asleep, but too relaxed to do anything else, so he just leans against Roddie and breathes.

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