who_is_she (
who_is_she) wrote2015-08-07 06:38 am
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The last two weeks had been a whirlwind. Immediately following the accident Tony had been reluctant to move further than several feet away from Roddie, even for the doctors to continue healing him. Things felt solid between them now, less like the floating, undefined thing they'd been before. Tony just... he loved Roddie, more deeply than he'd loved anyone, and apparently Roddie returned those feelings. They were... in love.
Tony was having trouble getting used to the idea, honestly. Roddie kept--there was no other way to describe it except gazing at him, adoringly, and Tony would catch him at odd times just... just looking, and it always unsettled him. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy it--no, it made him feel nice and warm inside--he just wasn't sure what to do with it, because he'd never had anyone look at him like that before.
They hadn't really had much time to just... be in love, though, because it seemed like all their time was spent worrying about something or another. The ship was still in bad shape, and Tony kept having to struggle with the engineers working on it to get past them because he lived on the ship, and he occasionally needed his and Roddie's belongings. More engineers had come to look at Roddie's prosthesis, but after hours of poking and prodding and testing they came up saying "we have no idea how this works, much less how to fix it". Tony had just been trying to wrap his head around what they were going to do--how they were even going to remove the cybernetics when they were hard-wired into Roddie's nervous system--when the engineer who'd been working on their ship took a look at it.
His name was Ayin, and he was another Torak (a detail which had not been lost on Zakeef, who'd been fidgety and nervous the whole time) and he asked to take a look. Roddie agreed, shrugging, and Ayin picked up his arm to look at it, flip open an access panel on the side, and then poke around inside. About a minute later he popped his head up, nodding, and reached for his tools.
"I can fix it," he'd said.
And fix it he did. It had taken a week, but he'd fixed it, even made some improvements apparently, and just today he'd finished and helped Roddie power it up, and Roddie had taken his first steps in two weeks. Tony had almost cried, but managed to hold himself back, settling for covering his mouth with his hand and staring. The ship was nearly back up and running again too, so it looked like they had the little room on the space station together for just a few more nights.
"Quite a day," Tony says offhandedly as he follows Roddie into the room they'd been sharing, closing the door behind them, "I think it was too much excitement for me."
Tony was having trouble getting used to the idea, honestly. Roddie kept--there was no other way to describe it except gazing at him, adoringly, and Tony would catch him at odd times just... just looking, and it always unsettled him. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy it--no, it made him feel nice and warm inside--he just wasn't sure what to do with it, because he'd never had anyone look at him like that before.
They hadn't really had much time to just... be in love, though, because it seemed like all their time was spent worrying about something or another. The ship was still in bad shape, and Tony kept having to struggle with the engineers working on it to get past them because he lived on the ship, and he occasionally needed his and Roddie's belongings. More engineers had come to look at Roddie's prosthesis, but after hours of poking and prodding and testing they came up saying "we have no idea how this works, much less how to fix it". Tony had just been trying to wrap his head around what they were going to do--how they were even going to remove the cybernetics when they were hard-wired into Roddie's nervous system--when the engineer who'd been working on their ship took a look at it.
His name was Ayin, and he was another Torak (a detail which had not been lost on Zakeef, who'd been fidgety and nervous the whole time) and he asked to take a look. Roddie agreed, shrugging, and Ayin picked up his arm to look at it, flip open an access panel on the side, and then poke around inside. About a minute later he popped his head up, nodding, and reached for his tools.
"I can fix it," he'd said.
And fix it he did. It had taken a week, but he'd fixed it, even made some improvements apparently, and just today he'd finished and helped Roddie power it up, and Roddie had taken his first steps in two weeks. Tony had almost cried, but managed to hold himself back, settling for covering his mouth with his hand and staring. The ship was nearly back up and running again too, so it looked like they had the little room on the space station together for just a few more nights.
"Quite a day," Tony says offhandedly as he follows Roddie into the room they'd been sharing, closing the door behind them, "I think it was too much excitement for me."

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"Yeah," he sighs, staring up at the ceiling for a minute before grinning over at Tony, "It was good, though, right?"
He pats the spot on the bed next to him, somewhat shyly. This would be the first night they'd shared a bed in which neither of them had immediately collapsed from exhaustion and worry, and Roddie couldn't help but wonder if that would...lead to anything.
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Tony nods, moving over to the dresser to change his clothes and missing Roddie's invitation totally.
"Yeah, that's true," Tony says, smiling to himself as he tugs his shirt over his head, "You must be tired." He looks over at Roddie, smiling softly over his bare shoulder. It was a shame that they hadn't had much alone time lately, but Tony was just glad all of the stress of the last couple of weeks was over. Though, to be honest, Tony almost got more anxious after things were resolved than when he actually had something to worry about.
"I can help you change, if you want," he says while changing into his pajamas, setting his dirty clothes aside.
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"Uhh...yeah, yeah," he says, clearing his throat and sitting up straight. He crosses his arms, and, with some effort, is able to pull his own shirt off over his head. He leans back against the headboard of the bed and folds his hands in his lap.
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Tony nods again, reaching for Roddie's clothes and pulling out a comfortable shirt and some shorts. Roddie had to be tired, more tired than he was letting on, because Tony knew he had a tendency to play down his own discomfort and pain. It had to have been rough, getting his legs working again after so long without.
Tony makes his way back to the bed, distracted by his own thoughts, and sets the clothes down next to Roddie. He picks up the shirt first and helps Roddie into it, holding up his robotic arm because the movement was still a little stiff. Then, without thinking twice, he unbuttons Roddie's pants and pulls down the zipper, tugging them down his legs with efficient and unsexy movements. He grabs the shorts and helps Roddie into them, having to pause when he got to his thighs.
"Can you lift your hips?" he asks, and pulls the shorts up when Roddie does, "Do you need anything? Some water, maybe? Are you hungry?"
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"U-uhh, no, not...not really," Roddie says, clearing his throat, before lifting his organic hand up and placing it on the small of Tony's back. He strokes his thumb over the bare skin of his back and bites his lip. After a moment of deliberation, he leans forward and presses a wet kiss to Tony's abdomen.
"I would like...something else though," he says, his voice cracking.
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Tony freezes at the kiss, his eyes going wide as he looks down at Roddie even as his hand automatically comes up to rest on Roddie's shoulder. He's not sure what Roddie means by that, because normally Tony wouldn't think anything of it, but the tone of Roddie's voice and the way it cracks makes him unsure.
He's nervous, suddenly, his thoughts starting to whirl as he attempts to puzzle out Roddie's meaning. Is he talking about sex? Or just affection? Or something else altogether and Tony's just got his mind in the gutter?
When he speaks his voice shakes a little but evens out.
"What, um... What is it?"
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"I...You're gonna make me say it?" he laughs, swallowing and wetting his lips, "I...Okay, well, um, we've...been dating a while, and I just...we haven't really...gone very far, I guess, as far as physical...stuff. And I thought maybe...you know, this might be...a good time to, uh...I mean, if you're ready, I've just been...thinking. About it."
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"Oh," Tony says, his face crimson as Roddie's meaning finally sinks in, and he swallows, the nerves amping up a notch. His grip tightens a little on Roddie's shoulder but otherwise he doesn't move a muscle, his throat closing up around words at such an intensely personal subject.
"I, um... I've been... thinking about it. Too," he manages after a long, quiet moment, his voice strangled. He'd honestly been trying not to think about it, but not very successfully, because after his disastrous realization that Roddie had only been intimate with one person, and he hadn't even liked that person very much, he wasn't sure if Roddie even wanted a physical relationship. He knew it wouldn't matter either way, that he'd want to be with Roddie anyways, but he hadn't prepared himself for this.
"Are you sure you'd... be all right? Don't you need rest?" Tony asks, his concern winning out over his anxiety.
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"I've rested. All I've been doing is resting," he mumbles, closing his eyes as he mouths at his skin.
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Tony's other hand comes up to Roddie's shoulder, his heartbeat thumping as he starts to realize where this is going.
"Roddie..." he objects weakly, leaning more heavily on him, his breathing deepening, "I don't know... You're still healing, Roddie." His tone is somewhat undercut by the way it shakes, now more exhilaration than anxiety.
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It's hard to look at him as he says this, but he turns his face upwards and does his best to make eye contact. Roddie feels himself flushing at the expression on Tony's face, and chews his lip to distract himself from what a vulnerable situation this was, for both of them.
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Roddie's words are so... final, and Tony realizes abruptly that he's not nearly as prepared for this moment as he thought he was going to be. He's not quite sure what Roddie expects or wants, or even what he's dealing with here, and he knows he has to ask but Roddie's looking at him just so and his mouth looks very... Nice.
So Tony leans down and kisses him, to distract himself from his own nerves, if only for a moment. Roddie's mouth feels as nice as it looks, and Tony's hands slide up Roddie's shoulders and bury themselves in his hair.
He breaks the kiss to sit down on the bed next to Roddie, putting an arm around him as he resumes the kissing. This is much nicer than being terrified, he thinks, and wonders for a moment if they could just do this forever instead of ever speaking again.
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Tony makes a real groan this time, pulling away from the kiss to bury his face in Roddie's shoulder, because there is no way he can say this while maintaining eye contact.
"Okay, well," he starts, and then his throat closes up around the words. It takes him a long, agonizing moment of silence to finally get his mouth working again.
"Well," he pauses again, but only momentarily, "Okay, I know anything about your genitals is on the list of 'questions not to ask' and I'm sorry but I'm not quite sure how to proceed without... Knowing. Oh, God." He pulls away from Roddie's shoulder just to bury his face in his hands instead, feeling and overwhelming mix of self-loathing and mortification.
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"Oh my...God," he laughs, flushing ear to ear, "Tony...Jesus, it's okay to ask that if you're going to...have sex with that person, just not like...out of the blue to a friend. Geeze."
He rubs his neck and misses a few beats before continuing with, "I can also just...show you," before hooking his thumbs into the waistband of his boxers and slowly wiggling them down.
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"Well, I don't know! It's not like I ever had to talk to a partner about anybody's genitals before!" Tony objects before he realizes what Roddie's doing, and then his mouth snaps shut and his eyes go wide. He can't quite believe Roddie would be so bold, but then again, this is Roddie.
He watches Roddie's skin appear with rapt attention, unbelievably embarrassed but unable to stop watching.
"Ah," he says, after Roddie has tossed his underwear away, "Well. That's all solved, then." He says, his voice a little squeaky until he clears his throat. He settles into a more comfortable position next to Roddie, licking his lips and wondering if he should take off his pants as well. He keeps his pants on, figuring that just one of them being pantsless was already too much.
"Um, what... Do you want to... Do?" He asks, finally able to look at Roddie's face as he speaks, though he can't maintain eye contact. After a moment's speculation he digs deep into the side pocket on his regulation trousers, pulling out a condom.
"I, um, have this," he says, holding out the condom like he has absolutely no idea what to do with it, "If... we need it. Just in case."
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"No, we...don't need that," he laughs, "I, um. Cant. My...those organs are all totally fried from the shots since I started so young, so...we don't have to worry about that."
His hand settles on Tony's hip, and begins to open his mouth to try and describe something they could do together, but when hears a faint crinkling in his pocket at the touch of his hand and feels the shape of what is almost certainly several more condoms, he reaches into his pocket, pulling out a fistful more and staring at them before guffawing loudly.
"Wow," he laughs, reaching into his back pocket despite his protests to see if there were any more, "You're real prepared, huh?"
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"I didn't know!" Tony exclaims, his face flushing darkly, "When we started... You know, I just, I didn't know what to expect or when to expect it and I didn't want to just have it happen and not..." Tony trails off, horrified at himself and the words coming out of his mouth.
"Oh, God," he groans, covering his face again and rolling away from Roddie, "All right, just forget it, call it off. It's fine, you're not interested anyways."
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Oddly, Tony's nerves help him feel a little more self-assured, and with this newfound confidence he leans forward plants several sucking kisses on Tony's jaw and neck. Reaching down between them, he fumbles with the clasp of Tony's regulation high-waisted pants for a moment (it was a bit of a struggle, since he still hadn't totally regained his coordination in his prosthetic hand) before getting them undone.
"Come on," he breathes into Tony's ear, before kissing at him, "Get your pants off, babe, I can't do this by myself."
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Tony whined quietly, not quite understanding why him making a fool of himself seemed to encourage Roddie, not make him disinterested in the whole idea.
Tony opened his mouth to point that out, but realized that was looking a gift horse in the mouth, and Roddie's hand was in his pants so why did Tony want to convince him that it shouldn't be?
In any case, Roddie's mouth on his neck was enough to distract Tony from his self esteem issues, at least for a little while, so he sighs and hooks his thumbs in the waist of his trousers. He flushes as he does it, part of him wishing he could just focus on Roddie and not have to think about Roddie's opinion on his thin, pasty thighs. He's past the point of turning back, though, so he pushes his pants down and pulls them off his legs, sitting up to roughly fold them and set them aside before sitting back in his tight white briefs.
"You, um," Tony starts, looking at Roddie's thighs and shirt and anywhere that isn't his face, "You still haven't said what you want to... Do."
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"I dunno," he mumbles against his mouth, hugging his middle, "I mean there's nothing that really...upsets me, or that I'm uncomfortable with, I just...can't really do much but lie on my back right now, is all. Um --"
Talking about this so bluntly was reminding him to be embarrassed and nervous, and he clears his throat.
"I think...you should take your underwear off first for sure, though," he jokes, before remembering his own shirt, which he struggles to remove as well, and he can't help but get a little enjoyment out of the way Tony looks at him when he's lying there exposed to him.
"Is there anything that...you like to do?" he asks, returning his hands to Tony's thighs.
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"Well, I've only really done, um..." he waves his hands vaguely, trying to think of a more tactful way of voicing his thoughts and failing, "Dick-in-ass sex, and like, not even... It wasn't that good, so..." Tony trails off, realizing how awkward that sounds, and using peeling his shirt off as an excuse to hide for a moment.
"I just..." he sighs as he sets his shirt aside, turning back to Roddie and hesitantly putting his hand on his waist, "I like you," he finishes, flushing darkly.
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"Look," he mumbles, feeling a pleasant warmth spreading through his body as he wets his lips. Carefully, he slides Tony's underwear down enough to expose his erection, and begins stroking it experimentally with his organic hand. With his prosthetic, Roddie gently takes the hand Tony has rested on his waist and guides it down between his own legs.
"We can...start like this," he breathes, his voice rising slightly at the end of the sentence, as he couldn't decide whether to phrase it as a question or a statement.
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"Oh... Okay, yeah," he says, realizing that the talking portion is over and they can focus on kissing again. He kisses Roddie harder than before, licking into his mouth as his hand explores between Roddie's legs. His touch is gentle as he feels his way, brushing down and then stroking back up more assuredly.
"Is that, um," he says against Roddie's mouth, realizing he's not quite sure what he's doing, "How's that?"
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"Thats good," he says, moving his kisses from his mouth to his jaw, "It's good if you like...take two fingers like this and...here."
His hand ghosts over Tony's, and he positions one of his fingers on either side of his small erection and guides him through a few strokes before letting go. Tony seems to catch on quickly, and he can't help himself from moaning quietly at his touch.
"Yeah, that's good," he encourages quietly, closing his eyes and stroking Tony with more intent than before, "You want to, um...do more than this?"
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Tony focuses intently on Roddie's instructions, looking down between them to better see what he's doing. Roddie's moan makes his head spin a little because he caused it; Roddie feels good enough to moan about something Tony did.
"Huh? Oh," he says, because it takes a minute to look away from Roddie's genitals and realize he's being spoken to, "Um, yeah, I... Sure."
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Tony can't help but laugh at Roddie's floundering and the idea that Roddie could be ruining anything, and he shakes his head and leans in to kiss Roddie again.
"It's fine, Roddie, you're not ruining anything. You can talk, I don't mind," he shrugs a little and then licks his lips, leaning over to suck on Roddie's neck just because he can.
"I think... I'd, um, like to... taste you? First? If that's... okay," he says haltingly, flushing darkly again.
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"Yeah, yeah," he stammers dumbly, nodding as he sits back a little and spreads his legs to let Tony position himself between them, "Yeah, that sounds...there's no way I'm gonna argue with that."
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Tony's not sure whether or not he should be offended by Roddie's snickering, but the easy and eager way he ushers Tony between his legs is clear encouragement enough.
He settles over Roddie, taking a deep breath and then leaning down to kiss his way across Roddie's skin. He's been thinking about this so much-- honestly, he'd been planning what he would do in his head, after they started kissing and Tony thought perhaps sex was on the horizon somewhere. He'd even done a little research on oral sex too, and had found a very helpful guide which he thought of now and made sure to follow.
He laid down on his stomach between Roddie's legs, staring down at his erection and feeling his own throb and his mouth water a little in anticipation. He swallows thickly and then leans down, making eye contact briefly as he reaches up with two fingers to stroke along Roddie's erection the way he'd shown him. After a couple strokes with his fingers he leans down to lick a long line up over Roddie's hole and erection. The taste is interesting, not immediately pleasant but somehow it tastes good just because it's Roddie.
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"J-Jesus," he stammers breathily. Finding it difficult to keep himself propped up on arms he hadn't properly used in weeks (especially when he found himself trembling slightly), he lies back onto his pillow and closes his eyes.
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Tony looks up when Roddie speaks, realizing he can see the whole length of his body and his face from here, and watches his face intently as he moves with more purpose.
He's still a little unsure in his movements, but lets Roddie's reactions be his guide as he explores him with his mouth. Roddie seems to enjoy his tongue on his clit, so he focuses on that, leaning back to get a good look and run it with his fingers before leaning back in to lick and suck at it.
Tony's a little surprised by how much he's enjoying doing this; he hadn't enjoyed giving oral to any of his other partners, but he was fairly sure that had a lot to do with how he didn't actually like any of his previous partners. This is totally different. Tony feels gratified by every one of Roddie's appreciative sounds, glad that he could communicate something like this when other forms of communication can be so difficult.
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"God, God, it's too much," he pants, urgently and somewhat deleriously as he jerks his hips away (which took some effort at this point, with how into the act Tony had gotten), "I-I don't want to yet, I-I don't want to wear myself out."
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Tony leans back as soon as he understands what Roddie is saying, clearing his throat and licking his lips, a little surprised at himself for how wrapped up he'd gotten in that.
"Um, yeah, right," he says, nodding and wiping at the dampness that was all over his chin and somehow on his neck as well. He sat up and then laid back down next to Roddie, finally rising away his underwear. He hesitates before kissing his mouth, unsure whether or not Roddie would find that gross, and settles for kissing his shoulder instead. He can't help but sigh a little and rub his erection against Roddie's hip, realizing how hard he'd gotten while he was distracted.
"Was that, um, good?" He asks, his voice shaking a little.
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He pulls Tony close by his waist and turns his attention to hungrily kissing his face, neck, and ears. He notices Tony had gotten very flushed, which puts a goofy smile on Roddie's face and makes his heart swell with affection.
"Haha, you're cute," he laughs dumbly, before reaching down with his organic hand and stroking Tony's cock more intently than he has before. After a bit of repositioning himself, he's able to slide his metal hand down Tony's side and squeeze at his ass.
"So it's true what they say about nerds..." he mumbles, only half attempting to mask his laughter, "You really do have the most supple baby asses."
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Tony flushes darkly at Roddie calling him cute, and then gasps at Roddie's hand on his erection, twitching a little at the much needed friction.
"Yeah," he says at first, too distracted and flustered to actually hear what Roddie had said, but after a beat it sinks in, "What-- wait, what?!" he cries, almost shrieking, "Who says that? What does that mean? That sounds horrible!"
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"It's good," he laughs, "Don't worry about it." Licking his lips, he continues stroking him, looking down between them and making fast and deliberate movements with his hand.
"That feel good?" he asks, looking at him earnestly and only realizing that the question might have come off as coy rather than genuine.
"Do you, uh...you know, want to get on top of me?"
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"Don't-- don't worry about it?" Tony repeats incredulously, his voice catching a little when Roddie picks up the pace, "God, yes, fuck I want to but don't-- don't think this is over, we're going to talk about that when I'm-- Later."
Tony huffs, breathing hard and flushed darkly, and it doesn't occur to him what they're about to do until he's already between Roddie's legs.
"Okay, um, are you... ready?"
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"Yeah, yeah, I'm ready," he breathes against his ear before nipping it lightly, "I'm ready."
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Tony nods, kissing back and getting distracted by Roddie's mouth for a long moment. Roddie's skin just feels nice against Tony's, soft and warm and a little cool on the metallic parts.
"Okay, just... Let me know if anything starts to hurt, or if I'm doing something weird, okay?" Tony waits until he gets a nod from Roddie, then swallows back his nerves and sits back to watch what he's doing.
He holds his erection at the base, lining himself up to the right spot and then gently, slowly pushing inwards. He gasps at the sensation, his hands going to the sheets on either side of Roddie's hips and holding tight as he watched Roddie's face for his reaction.
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"That's good, that's good," he says, once he stops feeling stunned, "That's really good. Come on, Tony, please."
He urges him to start moving by planting his hands on his ass and pushing his hips down into his body several times, hoping he'll pick up the pace.
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Tony moans back, a little overwhelmed by the indescribable sensation wrapped around his cock. It's... incredible, really, and Tony spares a thought about how this is definitely the best sex has ever felt, before he gets bowled over again by actually feeling it.
"Okay, okay, okay," he chants, a little bit lost as he shifts his arms to the bed next to Roddie's head, so that they can lay closely together. He experimentally moves his hips back and in, trying to mimic the way Roddie is guiding him, and groans at the wave of sensation. It's easy to fall into a rhythm after that, to just move in the way that feels best.
"Oh, God," he groans, mouthing sloppily at Roddie's neck, "Roddie."
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"G-God," he manages, tipping his head back and letting his mouth hang open, "God, please, Tony." Snaking a hand down between their bodies, he starts rubbing his own clit again, slowly at first but quickly matching the pace Tony was setting with his hips.
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Tony returned Roddie's moan, shifting closer so he could feel Roddie's skin against his. He braces his knees against the bed, spreading Roddie's legs a little bit wider so he can move his hips faster and harder.
He starts breathing heavily, groaning and swearing softly on the exhale.
"It's-- it's good, Roddie, so good," he mutters, leaning back to kiss Roddie's mouth. His hips are thrusting faster, his cock hard and throbbing as he fucks into Roddie.