who_is_she (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
who_is_she) wrote2014-11-07 12:24 pm
who_is_she) wrote2014-11-07 12:24 pm
i wanna be inside you homes
It had started as just an idea, a vague maybe-when-we're-older kind of idea that he'd never expected to actually happen. At the time Conner had rapidly scrawled it down on a post-it note, so that he wouldn't forget when the the buzz wore off. He still had the post-it, carefully preserved in a little plastic bag and tucked in along with the file of papers he'd collected over the last couple of years. He remembered the moment he'd written it down, too, because he'd expressed desire for a family to Gavin, a desire to give kids a better family life than he'd had (or Gavin had had, for that matter), and Gavin had gone all soft and gooey and they'd made love on the couch.
That had been four years ago. Him and Gavin had started sharing more about their respective horror story adolescences, and they'd started brainstorming ideas for what would have helped them have a less horrible, lonely time. It all basically boiled down to this: if they'd had someone to talk to, to treat them like a worthwhile human being with a problem, everything would have been easier.
Six months later Conner had posted a very personal video on his YouTube channel, telling the story of his teenage years and briefly touching on Gavin's similar circumstances and how it affected their relationship. The video was an unexpected success and the flood of supportive and empathetic feedback had been astounding. Conner received a number of messages from people with similar stories, sharing their own experiences, and even some from younger people who were currently dealing with the same problem, and telling him his video had given them hope and strength. The feedback had all been deeply moving, and sometimes deeply upsetting, and Conner had spent a couple of days after he published the video laying in bed with Gavin, holding him close and refusing to let him go further than the kitchen or bathroom. He'd made a follow-up video a few weeks later, talking about his interest in changing the way the people saw people with mutations, especially the way children with these powers were treated. He'd then been contacted by a few online groups dedicated to talking about these issues, and Conner and Gavin had both been invited to join their podcast (Conner's had to have Gavin explain to him carefully what a podcast was). Then Conner had gotten a call from an old friend.
Hybrid was practically the face of the mutant revolution, even if he himself hadn't been mutated so much as enhanced. Several years ago Hybrid's breakout from the government agency that had been holding him and his now-husband captive had been huge news, and had resulted in the first ever laws about the treatment of people with these powers. He hadn't exactly been seen as a social reformer since then, as he was rather reclusive, but his robotics company was growing rapidly after he'd come out with his designs for high-tech but cheap robotic prosthesis, based on the designs of his own robot limbs. He'd seen Conner's video as it had gone viral, and immediately picked up the phone to call his ex. They kept in touch sparsely these days, as Hybrid was a busy CEO now, but it had been good to hear from him.
Hybrid had expressed his interest in starting a nonprofit charity when he company grew big enough, and Conner had shared the summer camp idea that had been percolating for months, and Hybrid had thought it would be a great idea. Neither of them had the money to start it, but Hybrid had promise he was dedicated to the project.
After that, Conner had casually mentioned to the other online activists that he was old friends with Hybrid, and Hybrid had joined the little group.
It still took years, but they built a base of fans and listeners, and a website that primarily served as a forum for kids to talk about their experiences with their powers, and for adults to share advice or just commiseration.
Then, six months ago, Hybrid had called up and said their charity was ready to be funded. Hybrid's company was going to be the main contributor, as the charity was an offshoot of his company, but they would need as many contributors as they could. They had started a kickstarter campaign which had been overwhelmingly successful, and now they had a nonprofit organization with enough money to buy a summer camp.
Him and Gavin hadn't actually been able to see the land before it was purchased, as it was too far a journey to make in a weekend trip, even though it was still in Georgia. It wasn't until they'd both quit their jobs, packed everything they owned into a rental truck and driven for hours that they could see their new home for the first time. It was a solid forty-five minute drive from the nearest town, down a small highway and then a turn onto a dirt road, until Conner pulled off the road onto a weed-choked driveway that meandered up towards a beautiful old farm house. There was a barn, too, with a couple of acres of farmland on one side and a couple of acres of forest on the other side. It was perfect, really, and Conner slowly stopped the truck as they got closer to the farm house, until they were just close enough to see a majority of the property.
"Wow," he breathed, hands flexing on the steering wheel and biting his lip to drive off the sudden wave of emotion that had come over him. There was a small lake on the property as well, on the other side of the forest, and though right now everything was badly in need of fixing he could picture it so clearly: cabins for the kids and a mess hall would be built on the farmland, slightly set back from the farmhouse, with enough farmland behind the cabins that they could have grass planted and have fields for playing sports or setting up tents for parties, and they could actually tend some of the farmland as actual farmland, and grow their own vegetables and fruits and things to feed everyone, and they could make long, winding paths through the forest for hiking trails, and build a pier on the lake and have paddle boats.
"It's perfect."
That had been four years ago. Him and Gavin had started sharing more about their respective horror story adolescences, and they'd started brainstorming ideas for what would have helped them have a less horrible, lonely time. It all basically boiled down to this: if they'd had someone to talk to, to treat them like a worthwhile human being with a problem, everything would have been easier.
Six months later Conner had posted a very personal video on his YouTube channel, telling the story of his teenage years and briefly touching on Gavin's similar circumstances and how it affected their relationship. The video was an unexpected success and the flood of supportive and empathetic feedback had been astounding. Conner received a number of messages from people with similar stories, sharing their own experiences, and even some from younger people who were currently dealing with the same problem, and telling him his video had given them hope and strength. The feedback had all been deeply moving, and sometimes deeply upsetting, and Conner had spent a couple of days after he published the video laying in bed with Gavin, holding him close and refusing to let him go further than the kitchen or bathroom. He'd made a follow-up video a few weeks later, talking about his interest in changing the way the people saw people with mutations, especially the way children with these powers were treated. He'd then been contacted by a few online groups dedicated to talking about these issues, and Conner and Gavin had both been invited to join their podcast (Conner's had to have Gavin explain to him carefully what a podcast was). Then Conner had gotten a call from an old friend.
Hybrid was practically the face of the mutant revolution, even if he himself hadn't been mutated so much as enhanced. Several years ago Hybrid's breakout from the government agency that had been holding him and his now-husband captive had been huge news, and had resulted in the first ever laws about the treatment of people with these powers. He hadn't exactly been seen as a social reformer since then, as he was rather reclusive, but his robotics company was growing rapidly after he'd come out with his designs for high-tech but cheap robotic prosthesis, based on the designs of his own robot limbs. He'd seen Conner's video as it had gone viral, and immediately picked up the phone to call his ex. They kept in touch sparsely these days, as Hybrid was a busy CEO now, but it had been good to hear from him.
Hybrid had expressed his interest in starting a nonprofit charity when he company grew big enough, and Conner had shared the summer camp idea that had been percolating for months, and Hybrid had thought it would be a great idea. Neither of them had the money to start it, but Hybrid had promise he was dedicated to the project.
After that, Conner had casually mentioned to the other online activists that he was old friends with Hybrid, and Hybrid had joined the little group.
It still took years, but they built a base of fans and listeners, and a website that primarily served as a forum for kids to talk about their experiences with their powers, and for adults to share advice or just commiseration.
Then, six months ago, Hybrid had called up and said their charity was ready to be funded. Hybrid's company was going to be the main contributor, as the charity was an offshoot of his company, but they would need as many contributors as they could. They had started a kickstarter campaign which had been overwhelmingly successful, and now they had a nonprofit organization with enough money to buy a summer camp.
Him and Gavin hadn't actually been able to see the land before it was purchased, as it was too far a journey to make in a weekend trip, even though it was still in Georgia. It wasn't until they'd both quit their jobs, packed everything they owned into a rental truck and driven for hours that they could see their new home for the first time. It was a solid forty-five minute drive from the nearest town, down a small highway and then a turn onto a dirt road, until Conner pulled off the road onto a weed-choked driveway that meandered up towards a beautiful old farm house. There was a barn, too, with a couple of acres of farmland on one side and a couple of acres of forest on the other side. It was perfect, really, and Conner slowly stopped the truck as they got closer to the farm house, until they were just close enough to see a majority of the property.
"Wow," he breathed, hands flexing on the steering wheel and biting his lip to drive off the sudden wave of emotion that had come over him. There was a small lake on the property as well, on the other side of the forest, and though right now everything was badly in need of fixing he could picture it so clearly: cabins for the kids and a mess hall would be built on the farmland, slightly set back from the farmhouse, with enough farmland behind the cabins that they could have grass planted and have fields for playing sports or setting up tents for parties, and they could actually tend some of the farmland as actual farmland, and grow their own vegetables and fruits and things to feed everyone, and they could make long, winding paths through the forest for hiking trails, and build a pier on the lake and have paddle boats.
"It's perfect."
http://media.tumblr.com/9b91154f2ea95c4b0cd67195fb8dac39/tumblr_inline_na888dGarF1qmnn2x.jpg
"It is," he says, reaching over to squeeze Conner's shoulder. He opens the door and hops out of the car, not waiting for Conner to park the car, and takes a deep breath, running both hands back through his hair. "It's perfect, Conner. God, I can't believe it."
dewritos
"C'mon, Pot Brownie," he murmurs to the box, holding it close to his chest as he gets out of the truck and walks over to where Gavin's standing.
"I can't believe we're here, you know?" Conner says, holding up the terrarium so the toad can survey the land too, "I mean, it was just this, like, crazy dream. But we're here." Conner stares around at everything for a minute or two before turning back to Gavin, grinning, "Let's check it out." He jogs up to the old farmhouse (slowly, so as not to jostle Pot Brownie), and as he gets closer it's easier to see the house has been out of repair for some time. The paint is peeling and a few windows are boarded up, a few boards on the porch are missing and there's probably tons of issues with the wiring and plumbing inside the house. Conner's thrilled.
There's a lock box hooked onto the front door and Conner hands the terrarium over to Gavin so he can put in the code Hybrid gave him, then take out the key and open the door. The front door gives a fantastically loud creak as he pushes it open, and Conner's grin is huge.
Re: dewritos
The inside of the house is sweltering in the Georgia heat, and Gavin fans himself with his shirt.
"Whew," he says, sweat already gathering on his forehead. "No air conditioning. Good thing we brought those fans with us." He hands Pot Brownie's tank back to Conner carefully, and rubs Conner's shoulder once his hands are free.
"You want to set him up so we can look around?" he asks.
Re: dewritos
They'd filled up a cooler with groceries in the nearest town, and Conner grabs a couple of sandwiches and a couple sodas and decides to check out the barn.
"Oh, sweet, there's a hayloft!" Conner said, leading Gavin inside and up the ladder to the hayloft, food carried in one arm, "We should bring blankets and stuff up here."
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"Yeah, this is awesome," he agrees excitedly, sitting down and taking a sandwich and a soda from Conner, "We totally should." He scoots himself over to the side and lets his legs hang off the side, swinging them back and forth as he eats his sandwich. "Maybe also some, you know, hay."
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"But the fields are all overgrown and stuff. We don't have any hay," he said, looking around the barn, "I can hardly believe we're here. It's actually happening."
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"We're doing this," he says, pulling back and smiling brightly, "It's surreal."
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"Yeah, it is," Conner says, reaching up to idly run his fingers over Gavin's lips and then cup his cheek, "It's weird, like... Actually doing something. Rather than just... Existing, you know?"
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"I know what you mean," he sighs, leaning into the hand on his cheek. "It's like...this is going to be so much work, but I'm not even daunted by it. I'm excited to have like...a goal, instead of just trying to figure out how I'm going to get by, or trying to decide whether getting by is even worth it anymore. And this all seemed like some impossible dream, but...you made it happen, dude." He swallows, almost feeling choked up, and gives Conner's knee an affectionate squeeze.
Re: dewritos
"I couldn't have done it without you. None of it," Conner says, pulling back to look Gavin in the eyes, "I mean, everything I can do with my powers now, and hell, I never even realized everything I went through when I was a kid was shit until I met you. I thought I was just this lazy bum with this power that was shitty or, occasionally, a cool trick at parties. It's all so much more now, and we're gonna do this together." By the end Conner's voice is shaking a little with emotion, and his smile is a little watery. In the last five years his control over his powers had grown incredibly, and his power itself had grown as well. It was almost effortless now for him to siphon off Gavin's broadcasting, when he was broadcasting, which was less often these days. He could remove people's emotions without taking them into himself as well, and he could take in so much more without getting overwhelmed. He always had a line open for Gavin, now; Conner felt Gavin's presence in his mind as comforting as his presence at his side.
Re: dewritos
"God, Conner, don't cry on me," he says, wiping his cheeks with his hand, letting a little of the emotion he felt spill over; it was just the two of them, now, and sometimes keeping them in check was exhausting. He leans his forehead against Conner's and rests his hands on his shoulders, brushing the wetness out of Conner's eyes as he leans in for a soft kiss on the lips.
"If you cry I'm gonna start crying and it'll be a chain reaction crying marathon and neither of us will be able to stop."
Re: dewritos
"I don't know, maybe we deserve a good crying marathon. There's literally nobody around for miles. You could like, full on explode and nobody would even notice," Conner says his hands sliding down Gavin's face and chest to tuck around his waist. After a moment, Conner's smile turned into a smirk, "i just realized how true that is. For the first time since we started dating there's nobody around you could even try to affect with your powers."
Re: dewritos
"Wow, subtle. If you're trying to tell me something" he laughs against his mouth between kisses, "You're going to have to be more direct." In spite of his teasing, he's already on top of him within seconds, climbing into his lap and eagerly pressing his tongue into his mouth.
Re: dewritos
"Direct? I can do direct," Conner says, rolling Gavin over to his back, "I want to make you scream."
Re: dewritos
"For real though, should you still...you know, light up first? I mean..." his laughter trails off, and he gives Conner a slightly nervous look, "I mean...we've never really done this."
Re: dewritos
"Also we smoked the end of it in that truck stop parking lot," he adds, laughing.
Re: dewritos
Re: dewritos
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"God," he mutters, "I've wanted this for so long and now we can finally-"
He loses track of what he was saying, interrupting himself with another low moan.
Re: dewritos
He kisses down the trail of hair between Gavin's navel and his groin, reaching up to stroke over Gavin's clit before applying his tongue to the same spot.
Re: dewritos
"Fuck," he swears, reaching down to comb his fingers through Conner's hair as his heart starts to beat faster, "Yeah, that's good, that's so good." His apprehension was fading quickly, and he lets himself relax, taking in the feeling of Conner's mouth with simple, if overwhelming, enjoyment.
Re: dewritos
"You taste so good," Conner says between planting loud, sucking kisses on Gavin's clit, looking up to meet Gavin's eyes, "I could do this all day."
Re: dewritos
This time there's no neighbors around to disturb, no one around they could possibly bother, and Gavin does nothing to stifle the pleased sounds that are coming out of him now. The sensations that were usually dulled by the drugs were much sharper, now, and Gavin was loving the way it felt.
"God," he stammers, "God you're gonna make me- before we even- God,"
Re: dewritos
The one thing Conner knows for sure is that this is so much more intense than anything they'd ever done, and Conner hadn't quite realized how much the weed dulled the experience, at least in hindsight. Gavin's emotions were intense when he was high, and when he was stone-cold sober intense didn't cover it, and just the trickle of pleasure Conner was feeling from Gavin was enough to make him hard as a rock and thrusting into nothing.
i want you inside me homes
"God," he moans, sitting up after catching his breath for a moment, his emotions pouring out of him like they hadn't in years, "This is...I want to keep going. I want you so bad, Conner, I want you in me."
Re: i want you inside me homes
"Yeah, yeah," Conner says, panting, getting a dizzying headrush from Gavin's emotions as he leans up. He pauses with his hands on the wood on either side of Gavin's hips, swaying a little under the onslaught of Gavin's emotion. After a deep breath he starts moving again, standing up on his knees to push his pants and underwear down his hips and climb out of them. When he looks up Gavin catches him by surprise, laying back in the dappled sunlight filtering through the uneven roof, sweaty and panting and naked and so damn beautiful.
"God, Gavin," he breathes out, his voice heavy with emotion, swooping down to lay across his body and kiss him hard, "I love you so much."
Re: i want you inside me homes
"I love you too," he sighs, running his hands up and down his back, desperate to feel every inch of him, "So much."
Re: i want you inside me homes
"God, you feel... So much," Conner says, burying his face in Gavin's shoulder without paying attention to his words either, "There's so much." His focus is on the wash of Gavin's affection and pleasure, Conner can feel the afterglow right through him and Conner feels absolutely drenched in it. It feels like rain, like a thunderstorm, claps of thunder and bolts of lightning and big, fat water droplets all over his skin.
Re: i want you inside me homes
"Shh-" he laughs, bringing his hand back up through Conner's hair, "It's okay, it's okay. This will feel better than - than that." He focuses for a moment, bringing his emotions back under his control long enough to give Conner a chance to breathe.
Re: i want you inside me homes
"God, I wasn't really expecting it to be this intense," Conner says, biting his lip as he runs his hand down his erection, then leans back over Gavin. He puts one hand on the wood next to Gavin's head, the other on his cock as he guides it between Gavin's legs, stroking the head over Gavin without pushing in, "Are you okay? Comfortable?" he says, leaning down to kiss Gavin briefly.
Baby, I know places we won't be found And they'll be chasing their tails tryin' to track us down Ca
"I'm good," he breathes, bringing down the intensity of his feelings further, giving Conner a moment to relax. "I'm really good. I-it's not too much for you, is it? You'll be okay?"
Re: Baby, I know places we won't be found And they'll be chasing their tails tryin' to track us dow
"Okay, I'm gonna..." he trails off, sitting up again to look down between them as he finds the right spot and starts to push. Gavin's still sopping wet from his first orgasm and relaxed, so Conner pushes in in one long, slow thrust, moaning as he did.
Re: Baby, I know places we won't be found And they'll be chasing their tails tryin' to track us dow
"Yeah, yeah," he moans, wrapping his legs around Conner's waist and moving his hips against him in a slight motion, "You feel good, God, you're so hard."
in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
"Oh god," Conner says, feeling the low simmer of emotion start to bubble up as Gavin releases his control, starting to move his hips in a slow, halting glide.
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
"God, Conner," he moans, giving in to the swelling feeling in his chest, He shifts against him, matching his pace so as not to overwhelm him, even though his hips begin to jerk and he wants nothing more than to move hard and fast as much as Conner does. Slowly dragging his lips along Conner's cheek, he pulls his face back far enough to kiss at his mouth, lovingly, if sloppily.
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
The emotions are overwhelming in a different way, not in a way related to his powers, the kind of overwhelming that makes Conner start to shake and grunt on every thrust. He feels Gavin's love down to his very bones, and feels his own echoing gratitude and disbelief in return, that he could be so lucky as to have someone as wonderful as Gavin who feels so strongly about him.
"Gavin," he chokes out, his voice hoarse and tears pricking at the corners of his eyes as he moves to press his face into the skin of Gavin's chest.
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
"Conner? Conner, baby, are you okay?" he asks, finding his own voice nearly as unsteady as Conner's. The way he says his name is enough to put a lump in this throat, and he does his best to swallow it. Conner was trembling, hardly able to keep himself steady.
"Here," Gavin offers, rolling himself over on top of him, gently, lying Conner flat on his back, placing the tangled wad of their clothes under his head for padding. He rolls his hips, carefully, leaning close and watching Conner's face as he starts to move in a steadier rhythm. He finds his hands and laces his fingers with his own, bracing himself against the floor.
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
When Gavin rolls him over Conner is immensely relieved, some of the pressure easing as he lets Gavin take the lead. He meets Gavin's eyes and squeezes his hands, tears still rolling down his temples when he closes his eyes.
"That's good, Gavin," he says, panting, moving his hips up with Gavin's rhythm, "It's fine. Don't stop." He blinks up at Gavin a few times before he feels another wave of emotion that has him tipping his head back and squeezing his eyes shut and moaning loud.
"I love you," he chokes out, his voice broken open and shaken, "I love you so much, Gavin, I-- Fuck."
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
"Okay, okay, okay. Okay, I'm not stopping," he breathes, gasping for air as he picks up the pace. He kisses Conner again, moaning into his mouth, and his movements grow more and more erratic.
"Conner, I love you too, I love you, I-"
The orgasm takes him by surprise, overcoming him, and his whole body shakes with the force of it. He swears, feeling himself tighten around Conner, and he clutches at him desperately as he lets himself go, riding him through it as best he could.
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
He collapses back, boneless and shivering, and though the urgency passes quickly the shaky, broken-open overwhelmed feeling lingers. Conner peels his fingers away from Gavin's hips and covers his face, his breathing and hands still shaking badly. He feels like something has inexorably shifted in his chest, like Gavin has crawled right up into him and refused to leave. He still feels that strong, deep love echoing between them and it feels special, feels like he has a special connection to Gavin that has always been there but just now solidified into a cord stretching between them, a cord that's always tugging Conner closer to Gavin.
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
He sighs shakily, reaching up to take the hands he has on his face and bring them down, wiping the tears from his face before clasping at his hands again, holding them against Conner's chest. He rests his head on his other arm, letting his own eyes fall half closed as he looks into Conner's.
"How are you feeling?"
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
"God, I don't even know," he lifts Gavin's hand to his mouth to kiss his knuckles, even though his hands are still shaking, "Would it be weird to say I feel like our souls are like, bonded? That's kind of what it feels like." Conner pauses, looking away without moving his head, "Like I'd be happy if I never had to leave your side. For like, the rest of my life." Conner laughs a little, quietly and awkwardly, when he realizes what he's just said, and when he looks back at Gavin his eyes are wary and vulnerable.
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
"Conner, I'm..." he sits up a little, looking at him closely, covering his mouth with one hand. The look in his eyes said as much as his words, and Gavin could feel his heart pounding in his chest.
"Are you...trying to tell me something?" he asks.
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
"Yeah, I guess I am," Conner says, though he didn't realize what he wanted until this very moment, "I mean, I've been thinking about this for a while, but... Well, we're about to embark on this--this huge adventure, and I think... We should do it right." Conner looks up into Gavin's eyes, his expression serious and intent, "We should--I mean, uh, do you want to get married?"
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
"What the fuck, Conner!" he half laughs, half sobs, bringing his hands up to clutch at the sides of his face, feeling an astounding mix of elation and deep confusion, "I mean, yes, of course I do, yes, yes, yes, but I can't believe you're even asking me this right now!"
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
"What's wrong with right now?" Conner asks, grinning so wide his cheeks are hurting, "I mean, we just had the greatest sex ever, like so good it literally made me cry, and... I don't know. It just seems like a good idea." He ends a little more somber, his grin dimming a little bit but staying just as warm. After a moment's hesitating he leans in, kissing Gavin soundly.
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
"I can't believe you," he laughs, rubbing his eyes furiously and to little avail, "I can't believe you proposed to me naked- not even a minute after we-"
He shakes his head, letting himself cry, realizing privately that he wouldn't have had it any other way.
Re: in the dead of night your eyes so green and i know for you it's always me
After a couple minutes of quietly crying on each other, Conner pulls back, sniffling and wiping at his face.
"We should-- We can finish the farm, get everything set up for the camp, and then get married here," he says, smiling distantly as he imagines it, "That would be good."